News flash: kids in Montenegro know how to crank call. And they have my home phone number. The only people who have my home phone number here are people who don’t live here: family and friends abroad. Being a bit of a control freak as well as someone who doesn’t really enjoy talking on the phone, I like to know who is calling. The landline phone in my apartment is a very old phone that has poor sound quality. I can’t move at all when I am talking, otherwise all the person on the other end can hear is static. It doesn’t have caller ID (duh), so I don’t know who is calling. The concept of leaving messages hasn’t quite caught on yet here, so neither landlines nor mobile phones have message centers. This is convenient (because I never have to return phone calls) but a pain when you are living far from your family and friends it would be nice to hear a familiar voice. In short, I always answer the landline if I can because in theory it is someone calling from abroad and is thus someone I would like to talk to, right? WRONG.

This evening I was making dinner, listening to my iPod, and relaxing after a long day at work. The (fixed) phone rang and I ran to answer it, thinking it was my mom or sister. Nope. I heard a strange voice mimicking me: “hello.” I should note that I answer the phone here like I would in the States, with a great big hello. People here answer the phone by saying, “da”—not really my style, so I use hello. Anyway, being the idiot that I am, I thought it might be a friend playing a joke so I kept saying, “Hello, so-and-so, is that you? Hello? Hello?” This was met with laughter on the other end. So I hung up. Just as I went back to chopping vegetables, the phone rang again. And when I answer (hesitantly), I heard, “Helloooo” in an accented high-pitched voice that I didn’t recognize followed by, “Hello, hello it is me.” Giggle giggle. I hung up again without saying a word. A few minutes later the phone rang again. I reluctantly picked up without saying anything and I heard, “Hello, what are you doing? Talk talk.” I said, “I don’t feel like talking and I don’t know you, please stop calling, goodbye.” Then I hung up. Seconds later, the phone rang again. I took it off the hook and it's been that way ever since.